House of Quotes
House MD is one of my all-time fave series on cable tv and I guess I have stated that more than enough... hehehe... Anyway, as a homage to House, I have decided to create an entry of all the quotes I love. Here they are: (not in any kind of order though...)
* * *
Dr. Cameron: Men should grow up.
House: Yeah. And dogs should stop licking themselves. It's not going to happen!
* * *
Dr. Wilson: [To House.] Some doctors have the messiah complex – they need to save the world. You have a Rubik's complex – you need to solve the puzzle.
* * *
Chris: You're reading a comic book.
House: And you're calling attention to your bosom by wearing a low-cut top. Oh, I'm sorry – I thought we were having a 'state the obvious' contest. I'm competitive by nature.
* * *
Detox (series 1)
House: I take risks - sometimes patients die. But not taking risks causes more patients to die. So I guess my biggest problem is I've been cursed with the ability to do the math.
* * *
Heavy (series 1)
Dr. Foreman: Have you seen the latest research?
Dr. Chase: Yes, I have. What I haven't seen lately is a kid eating an apple or riding a bike. You Americans can't even compete with the rest of the world in basketball anymore, unless, of course, it's the type you play with a remote control on a big screen TV.
Dr. Foreman: Right.
House: Wait! Are you going to let him say that? He insulted our basketball teams!
* * *
Kids (series 1)
Dr. Spain: Wow. I thought you'd be the last person to have a problem with nonconformity.
House: Nonconformity, right. I can't remember the last time I saw a twenty-something kid with a tattoo of an Asian letter on his wrist. You are one wicked free thinker. You want to be a rebel? Stop being cool. Wear a pocket protector like he does and get a haircut. Like the Asian kids who don't leave the library for 20 hours stretches, they're the ones who don't care what you think. Sayonara.
Dr. Wilson: So should I go through all the resumes looking for Asian names?
House: Actually, the Asian kids are probably just responding to parental pressure, but my point is still valid.
* * *
DNR (series 1)
Dr. Cuddy: When I hired you, I knew you were insane. I will continue to try and stop you from doing insane things, but once they're done... Trying to convince an insane person not to do insane things is, in itself, insane. So when I hired you I also set aside $50,000 a year for legal expenses. So far you've come in under budget.
* * *
Skin Deep (series 2)
Dr. Cameron: Could we talk about her health instead of her breasts?
House: Could be relevant. Come on Cameron, it's nothing to be ashamed of. Many women develop breasts.
* * *
Dr. Foreman: You figure that anybody that gives a crap about people in Africa must be full of it?
House: Yes. There's an evolutionary imperative why we give a crap about our family and friends. And there's an evolutionary imperative why we don't give a crap about anybody else. If we loved all people indiscriminately, we couldn't function.
Dr. Foreman: Hmmm. So, the great humanitarian's as selfish as the rest of us.
House: Just not as honest about it.
* * *
Pilot (series 1)
House: [to Cameron] I hired you because you look good. It's like having a nice piece of art in the lobby.
* * *
All of series 1 (series 1)
Dr. Foreman: Oh, Cameron, I need you for a couple of hours.
Dr. Cameron: What's up?
Dr. Foreman: When you break into a house, its always better to have a white chick with you.
* * *
Fidelity (aka: Truth or Consequences) (series 1)
House: As long as you're trying to be good, you can do whatever you want.
Dr. Wilson: And as long as you're not trying, you can say whatever you want.
House: So between us, we can do whatever we want. We can rule the world!
* * *
Paternity (series 1)
House: Another reason I don't like meeting patients. If they don't know what you look like, they can't yell at you.
* * *
Maternity (series 1)
House: Lift up your arms. You have a parasite.
Jill: Like a tapeworm or something?
House: Lie back and lift up your sweater. You can put your arms down.
Jill: Can you do anything about it?
House: Only for about a month or so. After that it becomes illegal to remove, except in a couple of states.
Jill: Illegal?
House: Don't worry. Many women learn to embrace this parasite. They name it, dress it up in tiny clothes, arrange playdates with other parasites...
Jill: Playdates...
House: [Showing her sonogram] It has your eyes.
* * *
The Socratic Method (series 1)
Dr. House: Love the outfit. It says "I'm a professional, but I'm still a woman." Actually, it sort of yells the second part.
Dr. Cuddy: Yeah, and your big cane is real subtle too.
* * *
House: "Cut your wrists, huh?"
Dr Beasley: "Greg, there are certain topics."
House: "Oh, I'm sorry. Is suicide taboo? Gosh, if I've broken a rule on my first day, I will kill myself."
Dr Beasley: "Group's over."
House: "That flew by."
* * *
House: "How like a man to think I enjoy slaving over a hot stove all day while you're off banging secretaries."
* * *
House: "The only thing you know is that I'm a genius who got a dog to pee in your toilet. You don't know how I did it, or more interestingly, where I peed."
* * *
House: "Don't think of it as digging up a body; think of it as keeping another one from getting buried."
* * *
House: "Just a little piece of the brain. Seemed a waste, the guy wasn't using it anymore."
* * *
House: "People don't get what they deserve. They just get what they get, and there's nothing any of us can do about it."
* * *
House: "The billionaire thinks the gods will treat him better if he's broke."
* * *
That's all for now though... there are way too many quotes already this space is too short for all the genius dialogue he utters. Hope you enjoy the list.
nmed 10/07/2010 @ 1:56pm Saturday
* * *
Dr. Cameron: Men should grow up.
House: Yeah. And dogs should stop licking themselves. It's not going to happen!
* * *
Dr. Wilson: [To House.] Some doctors have the messiah complex – they need to save the world. You have a Rubik's complex – you need to solve the puzzle.
* * *
Chris: You're reading a comic book.
House: And you're calling attention to your bosom by wearing a low-cut top. Oh, I'm sorry – I thought we were having a 'state the obvious' contest. I'm competitive by nature.
* * *
Detox (series 1)
House: I take risks - sometimes patients die. But not taking risks causes more patients to die. So I guess my biggest problem is I've been cursed with the ability to do the math.
* * *
Heavy (series 1)
Dr. Foreman: Have you seen the latest research?
Dr. Chase: Yes, I have. What I haven't seen lately is a kid eating an apple or riding a bike. You Americans can't even compete with the rest of the world in basketball anymore, unless, of course, it's the type you play with a remote control on a big screen TV.
Dr. Foreman: Right.
House: Wait! Are you going to let him say that? He insulted our basketball teams!
* * *
Kids (series 1)
Dr. Spain: Wow. I thought you'd be the last person to have a problem with nonconformity.
House: Nonconformity, right. I can't remember the last time I saw a twenty-something kid with a tattoo of an Asian letter on his wrist. You are one wicked free thinker. You want to be a rebel? Stop being cool. Wear a pocket protector like he does and get a haircut. Like the Asian kids who don't leave the library for 20 hours stretches, they're the ones who don't care what you think. Sayonara.
Dr. Wilson: So should I go through all the resumes looking for Asian names?
House: Actually, the Asian kids are probably just responding to parental pressure, but my point is still valid.
* * *
DNR (series 1)
Dr. Cuddy: When I hired you, I knew you were insane. I will continue to try and stop you from doing insane things, but once they're done... Trying to convince an insane person not to do insane things is, in itself, insane. So when I hired you I also set aside $50,000 a year for legal expenses. So far you've come in under budget.
* * *
Skin Deep (series 2)
Dr. Cameron: Could we talk about her health instead of her breasts?
House: Could be relevant. Come on Cameron, it's nothing to be ashamed of. Many women develop breasts.
* * *
Dr. Foreman: You figure that anybody that gives a crap about people in Africa must be full of it?
House: Yes. There's an evolutionary imperative why we give a crap about our family and friends. And there's an evolutionary imperative why we don't give a crap about anybody else. If we loved all people indiscriminately, we couldn't function.
Dr. Foreman: Hmmm. So, the great humanitarian's as selfish as the rest of us.
House: Just not as honest about it.
* * *
Pilot (series 1)
House: [to Cameron] I hired you because you look good. It's like having a nice piece of art in the lobby.
* * *
All of series 1 (series 1)
Dr. Foreman: Oh, Cameron, I need you for a couple of hours.
Dr. Cameron: What's up?
Dr. Foreman: When you break into a house, its always better to have a white chick with you.
* * *
Fidelity (aka: Truth or Consequences) (series 1)
House: As long as you're trying to be good, you can do whatever you want.
Dr. Wilson: And as long as you're not trying, you can say whatever you want.
House: So between us, we can do whatever we want. We can rule the world!
* * *
Paternity (series 1)
House: Another reason I don't like meeting patients. If they don't know what you look like, they can't yell at you.
* * *
Maternity (series 1)
House: Lift up your arms. You have a parasite.
Jill: Like a tapeworm or something?
House: Lie back and lift up your sweater. You can put your arms down.
Jill: Can you do anything about it?
House: Only for about a month or so. After that it becomes illegal to remove, except in a couple of states.
Jill: Illegal?
House: Don't worry. Many women learn to embrace this parasite. They name it, dress it up in tiny clothes, arrange playdates with other parasites...
Jill: Playdates...
House: [Showing her sonogram] It has your eyes.
* * *
The Socratic Method (series 1)
Dr. House: Love the outfit. It says "I'm a professional, but I'm still a woman." Actually, it sort of yells the second part.
Dr. Cuddy: Yeah, and your big cane is real subtle too.
* * *
House: "Cut your wrists, huh?"
Dr Beasley: "Greg, there are certain topics."
House: "Oh, I'm sorry. Is suicide taboo? Gosh, if I've broken a rule on my first day, I will kill myself."
Dr Beasley: "Group's over."
House: "That flew by."
* * *
House: "How like a man to think I enjoy slaving over a hot stove all day while you're off banging secretaries."
* * *
House: "The only thing you know is that I'm a genius who got a dog to pee in your toilet. You don't know how I did it, or more interestingly, where I peed."
* * *
House: "Don't think of it as digging up a body; think of it as keeping another one from getting buried."
* * *
House: "Just a little piece of the brain. Seemed a waste, the guy wasn't using it anymore."
* * *
House: "People don't get what they deserve. They just get what they get, and there's nothing any of us can do about it."
* * *
House: "The billionaire thinks the gods will treat him better if he's broke."
* * *
That's all for now though... there are way too many quotes already this space is too short for all the genius dialogue he utters. Hope you enjoy the list.
nmed 10/07/2010 @ 1:56pm Saturday
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